


Hate Date Preparation Schedule

by argentConflagration



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, F/M, M/M, alternian male makeup headcanons sorry, karkat being nervous and adorable, that's it that's the whole plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-01
Updated: 2013-08-01
Packaged: 2017-12-22 02:50:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/908026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/argentConflagration/pseuds/argentConflagration





	Hate Date Preparation Schedule

At 10:30, you take a shower.

At 10:48, you brush your teeth. 

At 10:52, you brush your hair. 

At 10:56, you try to make it do that thing it sometimes does when you’ve just woken up where it stands up all intimidatingly. Your hair instead droops wetly against your head. 

At 10:58, you drag your toweled self back to your respiteblock and look for something nice to wear.

At 11:00, you panic and call Kanaya. 

At 11:04, she alchemizes you a nice polo shirt with your symbol emblazoned in bright red. 

At 11:04, she switches to gray.

At 11:06, she goes with you back to the ablution chamber, and starts fussing with your hair. 

At 11:10, she gets it to stand up like that.

At 11:12, she suggests you paint your nails, and you remind her that they don’t make nail polish in mutant red. 

At 11:13, she tells you that Rose probably has bright red nail polish and even if she doesn’t, it wouldn’t be difficult to alchemize some. You explain that you don’t want to paint your nails, only not in so many words. She apologizes. 

At 11:17, your nails are at least a little sharper and more presentable. 

At 11:19, Kanaya rubs some cream in under your eyes to hide the deep bags caused by too little sleep. 

At 11:27, she convinces you to let her try putting eyeliner on you. “Just A Little," she says.

At 11:35, Kanaya puts some blush on your face, making you look a little angrier when you scowl. You realize that having a human girlfriend must give you access to makeup made for people with mutant red blood.

At 11:42, she lets you look in the mirror, and by 11:51 all the makeup is off. 

At 11:53, you let her put just a tiny bit of the blush back on.

At 11:57, you panic because your date is in 3 minutes and you still haven’t gathered the things you need to bring or made food and oh god Kanaya what if he decides black romance is stupid or that he’s not a homosexual and this was such a stupid idea agreeing to this and why did I let Terezi convince me I’d be fine and at 11:57 Kanaya hugs you and tells you everything is going to be fine and you’ll make a wonderful rival to Dave and at 11:58 you believe her. 

At 12:01, you pack your sylladex with your husktop, some water, a hastily alchemized grubloaf sandwich. With some embarrassment, you also captchalogue a change of clothes and some bandages. Finally, you put within easy reach a pair of silly plastic shades, ones you alchemized specifically to mock Dave’s. 

At 12:07, Kanaya tells you again that you’ll be fine, and she’s sure everything will work out. 

At 12:08, she blushes and mumbles that if you and Dave don’t work out, she’d be more than willing to auspisticize you. 

At 12:09, she goes back to her respiteblock, leaving you standing in front of Dave’s door. 

At 12:12, you knock.


End file.
